For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. 

Jeremiah 29:11-13

 

I want you to know that you are not alone whatever you are going through.  I have been reflecting on some of the trials I have been going through lately.  I decided to share some of the things that I have been writing down in my journal.  I encourage you also to write and reflect on your life, your troubles and your triumphs.  We can learn a lot about ourselves and our relationship with the Lord by reflecting on our feelings during hard times. 

Today, I am writing about having a hysterectomy.  I have created a collection on this blog about the different challenges and insights I have had during this healing process.  Check out the links below this post if you want to read more about my story.  The following was written a few weeks ago:

 

I am somewhere in that mess over there

Pick me out of the darkness

and salvage my bones

Don’t leave me here in eternity

Desperate from feeling alone

Not getting unburied from my mess

 

What is the hope for my future?

I am somewhere in this hurt over here

Find me oh Lord in your plans for me

Lead me to a place of refuge when I call for you

Don't leave me here in this slavery

I need a place to call home

 

 

January 20, 2024

This first week after this surgery is not what I wanted, nor is it what I expected.  It is not that I am in pain, but I am in an emotional twist of loneliness that knots up my mind from feeling at peace.  I need peace to survive, and I need the Lord to survive.  The energy that comes from peace is a gift from the Lord.  I am understanding the scriptures where it says that we can do nothing when separated from the Lord:

 

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”

John 15:5

 

I felt separated from the Lord this first week. I felt like I couldn't feel him.  I felt like I should have been reading my bible, but I just didn't have the energy.  I thought for a second that I was in trouble with the Lord because I had this surgery.  You know, I thought that maybe I shouldn't have put my trust in Western medicine. I was a mess.  My mind was all over the place.  I don't know if it was the pain meds or the effects of the anesthesia.  I couldn't seem to focus on anything good.

BUT!

But something miraculous happened as my mom drove me to my first post-operation doctor’s appointment.  An old but familiar song reassured me that God had not forgotten about me.  He is always there.  The lyrics are as follows:

 

I’ll give you peace

When the storm is raging

I’ll be your light

When the road ahead seems dim

I have the power

Just put your trust in me

Anything you need

Have faith indeed

Just ask, just ask in my name

Just ask, in my name

 

I am the Lord

I can move all mountains

I’ll be your strength

When you’re weary, weak and worn

Believe in My Promise

Cast all your cares upon me

Anything you need

Have faith indeed

Just ask, just ask in my name

Just ask, in my name

 

In my name all things are possible

I’m able to do the impossible

 

Rev. Milton Brunson and the Thompson community singers

 

The more amazing thing was that I heard the song twice.  Rev. Brunson’s version I heard going home, but Smokie Norful did a remake, and it sang to my soul so familiar. This was the song I heard going to my appointment.

Check out song here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdTIzkSP7VE

 

 

So, It is on this day that I offer you and myself some encouragement when going through hard times.  Although we may feel like we can't get out of our mess, the Lord is always nearby.  He loves us and he cares.  We just have to pray and ask for our healing to recognize that he is indeed always in the process of healing us.  He is always in the process of delivering us.   Amen

 

"The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Deuteronomy 31:8

 

Please be strong and courageous even when you feel like a mess. I linked this video to you as well to encourage believers to build the kingdom up here on earth.  Let us continue to encourage each other. Amen

 

be blessed always 

 

-until next time

Tamorra

 

 

I continue to promote and encourage people to seek after the Lord for encouragement, hope, motivation, and food for your soul.  He said that if you really do thirst or if we are too heavy with the burdens of this world, then we can turn to him.  Let us turn to him so that he can restore our souls.

 

 

Here are some more posts about my story: